What is JOMO?

What the heck is JOMO? It’s the Joy of Missing Out, aka the opposite of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). We’ve gone way overboard with FOMO. Recent scientific research has found a correlation between a strong sense of FOMO and poor mental health outcomes (performance, sleep, depression, anxiety, physical well-being, etc.). People have become obsessed with what everyone else is doing and buying that they have lost the ability to differentiate between fact and fiction in the social media world. People are constantly scrolling and staying busy. When is the last time you sat quietly without technology of any kind and with nothing to do but breathe and stare at the wall for 5 minutes? Space and silence is critical to our health for many reasons.

I want to make a case for ditching the FOMO and embracing the JOMO. And here is why…

Do you remember when you went to the beach or the lake and you stared off into forever and reminded that your little problems don’t amount to a hill of beans in this big world? Maybe you felt that way when you laid down in the grass outside at night, marveling at the vastness of the sky, sprinkled with stars.

I remember those times.

Then, I forgot those times. There was so much to do, rather, so much I told myself I “should” do- like work, like bills, keeping up with the kids’ activities (mine are adults now woo hoo!), a partner, a pet, school, the community, the environment, the WORLD! I have wasted too much time scrolling social media wondering how everybody else has their shit together- their kitchens cleaned, their kids winning Nobel Peace Prizes at age 11, their world travels, their perfect outfits, their golden doodles perfectly groomed (without mats). I haven’t actually met any of these people in real life, have you? Oh well, there was that one neighbor who looked like Hee Haw when she walked her dog (no judgment, me too!) but I secretly found out she was posting provocative pictures of herself on Instagram. The funny part is that she has poses inside the apartment and around the complex, so the toilet paper holder in the background looked familiar. She must have taken the outdoor pics late at night so she could pose by the courtyard fountain without strange looks. But other than that, I don’t know these people. And none of that is actually my business.

I bet you are as overwhelmed and as exhausted as I was. I discovered that I am more happy the less I have to do, the less I tell myself that I “should do.” The less responsibility I put on myself, the deeper I breathe. The less complicated that I make things, the more time I have for the present moment, for possibilities and the things I want to do. For Me. Because I am actually a person.

I no longer have FOMO. It wasn’t easy, I have been working on my minimalist JOMO journey for some time now, and I am constantly revising my approaches. I’d like to invite you to walk with me on this path for awhile. I would like to give you the benefit of my experience and research. I’d like to challenge you to think differently about things and see if we can un-complicate some stuff. Let’s just see how far we can take this, just for fun.

I promise to not waste your time because you need to get back to the business of just being, breathing, loving and living. xoxo j.